Sigh I guess I just like torture. Kurt leaves for New York. Without Blaine.
1 year. 365 days. 8,760 hours. 525,600 minutes. 1,536,000 seconds
Kurt and Blaine were playing a game.
If it had a name, it would probably be called the let’s pretend this isn’t actually happening or something game.
They’d been doing doing this dance for a week now, and they were running out of time.
“Kurt…and uhm, Blaine,” the awkwardness in Burt Hummel’s pause and cough should have made them both cringe. He didn’t usually allow them to share a bed, if Blaine stayed at the Hummel-Hudson house, once midnight curfew struck he’d leave Kurt’s room and crash in the guest bedroom, but last night Kurt’s father had shaken his head when Blaine had made to go sleep on his own, and had smiled softly at him, Blaine returning the smile sadly before going back and curling up beside his boyfriend.
Blaine knew why Burt was affording him the privilege. Knew he couldn’t in good grace force Blaine to spend the one night he’d get with Kurt for a while on his own. He wanted Blaine to have this, this night where he didn’t cry himself to sleep, because he knew how lonely thing would get for Blaine after this night.
He didn’t know both of them had cried anyway, noses touching, tears mingling, Kurt brushing Blaine’s away and wanting to scream with frustration, because now he knew the worst feeling in the world; not only not being able to make the person you love stop crying, but knowing no matter how indirectly that you caused those tears.
They didn’t cringe at Burt’s words though. They barely noticed.
“We’re up.” Kurt called, not moving from where he lay, his arms around Blaine’s waist, his nose buried in the smooth, warm skin of Blaine’s back.
They made no effort to move for another few minutes though. Not talking, just being. Just having the opportunity for skin on skin, pressing kisses to all the parts of each other they could reach, Blaine clasping Kurt’s hand in his and lifting it to his lips to brush soft kisses over the spider web of veins on his inner wrist.
“We need to get up.” Kurt murmured eventually, feeling Blaine tense up in his arms, and wishing it didn’t have to be like this.
“I wish I didn’t have to leave you.” He said after a few minutes, and Blaine turned over so he was facing him, reaching his hand over to run it through Kurt’s bed hair.
“Me too.” Blaine mumbled thickly, as if he was trying not to cry. “But you have to.”
“One year.” Kurt said softly. “One year.”
“One year.” Blaine repeated. “365 days, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes and 31,536,000 seconds.”
“Geek.” Kurt returned, kissing his nose.
They stayed cuddled up for a little while longer until they actually had to get up, knowing Kurt would miss his flight if they didn’t.
The next couple of hours passed in a blur. They ate breakfast, Blaine helped Kurt pack up the last of his things, they got dressed (that particular part was delayed by the fact that Kurt pounced on Blaine just as he was putting his shirt on and resulted in a very unscheduled ten minute make out session, which was unsexily put to a stop by Finn knocking on the door and asking Kurt if he had flight socks, because of Rachel’s constant fear of deep vein thrombosis.)
“It’s an hour flight.” Kurt hissed through the door, whilst Blaine laughed adorably into his neck.
Then there was packing up the car; Finn running through the sheets of rain, hood up as he shoved Kurt’s huge suitcase and two travel bags into the trunk of Burt’s truck, then running back in sodden through.
“Appropriate weather.” Blaine mumbled glumly from where he sat at the table in the kitchen, as Kurt brought over the coffee he’d made for them to drink before they drove to the airport.
“Right,” Kurt agreed, unable to say anything else as they watched the sheets of rain pour down. He only grabbed Blaine’s hand over the table top and held it hard and hoped that would be enough, hoped that would say everything that was stuck in his throat.
I love you. You’ll be ok. We’ll be ok. I’m only a phone call away. One year.
A few minutes later, the inevitable moment came where Burt told them they should probably head off. So they ran out to the car, sheltering under Kurt’s umbrella, and made the forty minute or so trip to Lima Allen County airport.
The journey, like everything else over the past few months, went too quickly. It seemed like only a few seconds after Blaine climbed into the back seat beside Kurt and held his hand over the middle arm rest that Burt pulled into the short stay car park at the terminal.
They climbed out, and Finn and Burt took Kurt’s bags from him as Blaine hung back, obviously wanting to say goodbye to his boyfriend.
“We’ll give you a minute.” Burt said, and the two headed off, leaving Kurt and Blaine outside the airport, Kurt holding the umbrella up over both of them, the rain pouring in sheets around them.
“Are you not coming in?” Kurt asked breathlessly, and Blaine shook his head, silent for a minute as if trying to hold himself together.
“I think this is easier.” He said after the pause. “Now..the further I go-it’s just going to get harder.”
Kurt nodded thickly, trying to force the tears back but to no avail. Several escape his eyes and trickled down his cheeks. Blaine let out a thick laugh, tears dribbling down his own cheeks.
“Don’t cry, beautiful.” Blaine whispered, reaching up to thumb away the tears from Kurt’s cheeks. “I’l visit all the time and call every day…and in one year we’ll be living there together. 8,760 hours.”
Kurt looked at Blaine for a second, his tear filled eyes narrowed before glancing at the hand that held the umbrella.
“Screw this,” he said, throwing the umbrella to the ground pulling Blaine towards him by the waist, pressing his lips to Blaine’s passionately.
Blaine followed suit quickly, grabbing Kurt’s face roughly and clumsily as they kissed, not giving a shit that they were in Lima, because they could have been on the moon and he wouldn’t have noticed, as he gripped Kurt’s rain soaked hair between his fingers and drank his boyfriend in one last time before the inevitable gap between their next visit.
“I love you so much sometimes I can’t breathe.” Kurt admitted, his words so close and quiet they were just like whispered breath in Blaine’s mouth, and Blaine nodded, their tears and the rain mixing together so he couldn’t tell which was which.
“I know. I love you too.” He replied, pressing his lips to Kurt’s dripping forehead. “Forever.”
“Forever. However many seconds that is.” Kurt grinned, reluctantly pulling away from Blaine. “God I’m soaking.”
“Me too.” Blaine said, laughing at his drowned rat of a boyfriend. There was another silence, which eventually Blaine broke. He didn’t want to break it, wanted to stay standing silently in the rain with Kurt forever, because he’d never seen so much love in someone’s eyes as he saw in Kurt’s at that moment, and that love was for him, and it was overwhelming.
“You need to go. You’ll miss your flight.” Blaine said, and Kurt nodded, swallowing hard and gripping Blaine’s hands once more.
“Good-” Kurt started, but Blaine pressed a gentle finger to Kurt’s lips.
“No. What did we say?” Blaine asked, and Kurt smiled, ducking his head.
“I’ll be seeing you?” Kurt offered instead, and Blaine nodded.
“Better.” He replied, kissing Kurt’s lips one last time before breaking their clasped hands, trying to push away the feeling that he’d just let go of his anchor to the world. “I’ll be seeing you.”
Then he watched Kurt wave one last time and walk into the airport and towards the terminal. He tried desperately to ignore Kurt’s shaking shoulders, and the sobs building up in his own chest.
He climbed into the car and held himself rigidly, taking deep breaths.
It wasn’t goodbye.